“How Many Dogs Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb?”

Darn, I wish I had said that!  I recently read a great book by Dr. Stanley Coren. You might know him from his television program, “Good Dog!” which airs in Canada, Australia and New Zealand.  He is is a professor of psychology at the University of British Columbia and a recognized expert on dog-human interaction.  I highly reccomend his books. In ‘Why Does My Dog Act That Way?’, you will find the following entertaining bit of comic relief. He poses the question, “How many dogs does it take to change a lightbulb?” (to the dogs). The answer, it seems, depends on the breed.

  •  Border Collie: Just one, but why not let me change the light fixture so that it will accept fluorescent bulbs, which are much more efficient?
  • Bulldog: Don’t bother; I’ll just lie here in the dark.
  • German Shepherd: Just one, but it will have to wait until I’ve rescued those people trapped in the dark and led them to safety, and then checked the house to make sure that no one has entered under cover of darkness to take advantage of the situation.
  • Shetland sheepdog:  I will as soon as I arrange all of the new bulbs in a tight and orderly little circle.
  • Golden retriever:  The sun is shining, we’ve got no work to do today, I’ve got this neat red ball here, and you’re inside worrying about some silly lightbulb?
  • Rottweiller: Go ahead, and see if you’re tough enough to make me!
  • Corgi: First, I’ll bark until the old bulb leaves of its own accord and then I’ll nip at the new one until it goes into the socket…
  • Labrador retriever: I can do it! Please!….Please…I can. You know I can. Please….
  • Greyhound:  It isn’t moving, so who cares?
  • Pointer:  I see it. There it is. Look, it’s right there…
  • Jack Russell terrier:  Me! I can reach it! All I have to do is to keep bouncing off the furniture and walls.
  • Poodle:  I’ll just whisper sweet nothings into the Border collie’s ear and he’ll do it.  By the time he’s finished putting in the new light fixture, my nails will be dry.

This is a great book. It also includes a ‘dog behaviour inventory’ for you lovers of quizzes. Look for other titles by Stanley Coren.


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